Letter 2

Dear Shay,

Hello there! I'm writing because I happened to find your webpage and thought I'd see what you might have to say about what's going on in my life. Thanks for taking the time for reading this.

Okay, this is it, I'm overweight and it's really starting to become a problem. I've been on diets in the past, and I have lost weight, but nothing ever continues working. I have been recently thinking about having a surgery done...it's called Distal Gastric Bypass / Duodenal Switch Procedure. Here's a little bit of info about it.

<<The procedure is a major surgery that rearranges the intestines so that the majority of food calories are not absorbed, resulting in progressive, long-term weight loss in most obese persons. It is important to be aware that many physical, social, and emotional changes occur as a result of this surgery.>>

Here's the address as well in case you want to read more about it. It's http://www.pacificsurgery.com

I have spoken with my parents about having this done and they are very wary of me having such a procedure done. It does have some risks, but being as I'm young and a non-smoker I think the odds are with me. I can understand their concerns, but they just don't know how I feel. I have recently become very depressed and have even thought about suicide. I know that I would not kill myself though, and have put all thoughts of that out of my mind. It's just that things are so hard when everyone around judges you on how perfect you look. It's made my life hell on a social level, as well as worry me about possible health problems in the future.

I don't really think I have a question for you. I guess I just wanted to see what you thought about all of this. Thanks again :)

Let me start by saying that I have an idea of how you feel. I was once much heavier than I am now, about 80-90 pounds heavier. I'm very aware of the difference being lighter can make in your life. In this society there is also a terrible double standard imposed on women and how they look. Your feelings are normal.

I have also been depressed to the point of suicide. Like you, I've never attempted it, but I just want you to know that I understand where you're coming from on both the weight issue and the depression issue

I also went to the link you gave me and read everything I could find on that procedure. Here is my take on things:

Depression is horrible. Let's just face it, when you're depressed, even if you don't commit suicide, you feel like you're dead anyway. Not in the harps playing, angels like me coming to get you way either. You feel like you're in the proverbial hell. There is no reason for any person to stay in that frame of mind if there is a logical way to change that thought pattern. You do have a good reason to get this procedure done. As for the procedure...

It looks to be very safe. I'm not a doctor, but after reading the information provided, if I was in your situation, I would consider the procedure myself. However, be sure to see if any of your medical coverage will help you foot the bill for it.

Your parents need to understand how you feel. You need to let them know that you are not living a fulfilling life. In my opinion, if any parent ever knows that his/her child is not enjoying life through no fault of their own, and that parent has the means to help them get more from their experience on this planet, then they have a moral obligation as loving parents to help their son/daughter get the help they need. Get that message across to them, possibly in a letter followed up by a long discussion.

I want you to be a happier person. I'm praying for you. I've also been told by my guardian angel and team leader, Michael, that as soon as I started responding to your letter, there was a group of angels sent to help take care of you during this ordeal in your life. Michael was quite amused at the speed with which they showed up and were then promptly whisked to your side. He said there were three of them, two tall males and a short female. The female was determined to help you, while the two males were there as support for the female, but she is definitely the one running things. She's your team leader. Michael's advice to you to help you get the most from your team is to be the most loving, compassionate, sweet girl that you can. And, he adds, praying for "good", even if you don't pray to any particular deity, works just as well.

Remember now, you've got angels working for you, 24-7. Fear is gone. Believe that, and your life is...heaven...

Love, Shay